Wonder

Dear God,

Something unexpected is happening.

I thought I was writing these letters to You, but somehow You're using them to write on me.

I'm only one letter into this journey, yet I already find myself wanting to talk with You more. I notice things I probably would have walked past before. Conversations feel different. FanStory feels different. Working on Walk with Him feels different. It's like every piece is quietly pointing to the same place.

Maybe that's what You've been doing all along.

I've spent a lot of time thinking about the way my mind works. For years, people have attached labels to it. Attention deficit disorder sounds like something broken that needs fixing. But I'm starting to wonder if maybe it just means I explore differently.

My thoughts wander.

Maybe they're supposed to.

Didn't You create us to explore? To wonder? To ask questions? To study the world You made, care for it, learn from it, and discover pieces of You hidden throughout it?

I've realized I love two words that are only one letter apart: wander and wonder.

I hope I never lose either one.

I want to wander through the life You've given me with eyes wide open, always wondering why things are the way they are, how they work, and what they reveal about You.

Sometimes I wish I could see Your work while it's happening instead of years later.

Looking back, Your fingerprints seem so obvious.

Looking ahead, they can feel invisible.

But lately I've noticed something.

A friend of mine and I keep talking about these little moments of synchronicity. Tiny coincidences that happen at just the right time. Conversations that overlap. People showing up when they shouldn't. Ideas arriving together.

Some people would call them chance.

Maybe they are.

Or maybe they're gentle reminders that You're always in rhythm, even when we aren't.

I wonder how much loneliness would disappear if we learned to move in rhythm with You... and with each other.

I've always believed people are beautiful.

I remember telling someone once that all women are beautiful. They pointed to someone and jokingly asked, "What about that one?"

I laughed and said, "Dude... that's a man."

It's a silly memory, but I still believe what I meant.

Every person bears Your image.

Some are hurting.

Some are lost.

Some are hard to love.

But none of them are beyond compassion.

Maybe that's because none of us are.

Thank You for the mind You've given me, even when it feels scattered.

Thank You for my family.

For my friends.

For the people I haven't met yet.

And thank You for the countless people I'll never know whose lives created ripples that eventually reached mine.

I wonder how many ripples You'll let me create before I come home.

Until then, help me keep wandering.

And never stop wondering.

Amen.

Your Son